Notable Quotes

“Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way when you
criticize them, you are a mile away from them and you have their shoes.”

— Jack Handey



“My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start.
So far I’ve finished two bags of M&Ms and a chocolate cake. I feel better already.”

— Dave Barry



“Government is instituted for the common good;
for the protection, safety, prosperity, and happiness of the people; and not for profit, honor, or
 private interest of any one man, family, or class of men…” 

— John Adams



“Man, once surrendering his reason, has no remaining guard against absurdities the most monstrous,
and like a ship without rudder, is the sport of every wind.
With such persons, gullibility, which they call faith, takes the helm from the hand of reason and the mind  becomes a wreck.”

— Thomas Jefferson (1822)



“Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule
— and both commonly succeed, and are right.”

— H. L. Mencken



“I’m sick of following my dreams, man. I’m just going to ask where they’re going and hook up with ’em later.”

— Mitch Hedberg



“Clothes make the man.Naked people have little or no influence in society.”

— Mark Twain



“Neither the wisest constitution nor the wisest laws will secure the liberty and happiness
of a people whose manners are universally corrupt.” 

— Samuel Adams (1749)